Centered and relaxed. These two words are not the ones that come up first when I think about the holidays. Forget Santa Claus. I become Superwoman. Also known as “she who does it all.”
If you’re like me, you’re grateful for any time you get to yourself between Thanksgiving and New Year’s. Meditation, long walks in nature, binge watching British television, or tub baths sound just wonderful - for someone else.
Holidays are complicated. They can be chaotic. At any gathering, the wide range of personalities can make you doubt your sanity.
Yes, it’s true that we cannot control our families, friends, or guests, but we can cultivate inner calm. We can choose our responses. We can act in alignment with our values. We can show compassion to ourselves and to others.
We can even get through a lovely turkey dinner with all the trimmings without feeling as though we ingested kryptonite.
Gratefully, we don’t need to be Superwoman to survive the holidays. We just need to remember who we really are, deep down, at our powerful core.
When you are coming from a centered place, it becomes possible to honor your most important commitments to yourself.
Your healthy boundaries may include things like “no politics,” or “no cutdowns.” Don’t be afraid to remind others of these expectations, and be willing to walk away or refuse to engage if your boundaries aren’t respected.
Avoid unpleasant people if at all possible. It helps. If you can’t avoid them, choose to say no to baiting, and therefore to being dragged into their drama. Unpleasant persons want a reactive response. Don’t add fuel to their fire. Remove yourself from their reach.
When under fire, use the matching gold bracelets that came with the costume to elegantly deflect whatever comes your way.
Better yet, stay calm, be compassionate, and detach.
If you need a moment, take one. Grab a drink. Daydream about the beach. Breathe. Invoke the Goddess. Sit in your car and listen to music. Call a friend and wish them well. Do whatever you need to do to be okay.
As Superwoman, you can choose to defy the laws of space and time.
Arrive when you wish and leave when you wish. Don’t feel like you have to spend all day or stay late. You only need to do what feels right to you.
Be gracious when you take your leave. Say “thank you” to your hostess, “I love you” to people who matter most, and “wishing you all the best” to people you won’t see again for at least another year.
When we get home, let’s hang that Superwoman cape on a hook. It’s time to give ourselves a much deserved break. In the holidays, as always, we deserve to do - or not do - whatever our spirit needs and our heart desires.